Mercy, Not Reason



I Peter 1:3-5

As I sit on my patio, the sunshine is warm and comforting. This is good, I need comforting right now. Prayers for understanding have been futile. Leaning back to let the soothing warmth of the sun bathe my face, I try to focus on my Lord’s provision instead of life’s trials.

With forced effort, I remind myself that it is often easier to see God’s presence in the aftermath than it is during the storm. Closing my eyes tight, I struggle to run ahead in time and view today from the rearview mirror of tomorrow. No revelation is found. A yard lizard crawls out of the shadows and crouches on the leaves in the sunshine.

If I could just “pray through,” as the old preachers say, if I could just “grab hold of the horns of the altar and not let go”—I would find relief. But, exhausting prayers have been made– to no avail. Perhaps, after all, there was no lesson that could be had?

Could there be no spiritual truth to be gleaned; are some things in life simply events? The lizard looked up at me, as if it heard my silent questions. I angrily threw a wadded up tissue at it, but, as it seemed with my prayers, was ignored for my effort.

As I sat, spent from crying, exhausted from the pain of questioning a silent God, I watched the lizard sit still in the sunlight, soaking up the heat.  In weary resolve, I set aside the searching and in silence, watch the yard lizard stretch as his body warmed.  In introspect, I begin to realize that I don’t have to know “Why?” all I have to know is that—God is. He said it Himself, “I AM.” (Exodus 3:13-15)

Why must I demand to know answers for everything? Exhausted with the vanity of searching; I simply let go. No more looking for reason; just simply, a cry for relief.  In total surrender, I no longer seek logic, just—- mercy.

As if a floodgate has been opened, my pain is released!  The intimate, Spirit led, awareness that He is God and He does not have to explain Himself to me washes away the confusion. The release from my emotional pain is — stunning.

He is God and He does all things well, working them for my good, not necessarily so that I “feel good.” The lizard, warmed by the sunshine runs off into the grass.  And I, warmed by God’s sovereign presence, finally—rest.

I Peter 1:3-5 Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade—kept in heaven for you, who through faith are shielded by God’s power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time.

Prayer:   Father, help me to realize that everything in my life doesn’t have to be understood by me. Give me insight to understand lessons that are to be learned out of every day experiences. Show me how to worship you for your sovereignty over all things, whether I understand them or not. Thank you for your great mercy. Amen.

Scripture references

Exodus 3:13-15  Moses said to God, “Suppose I go to the Israelites and say to them, ‘The God of your fathers has sent me to you,’ and they ask me, ‘What is his name?’ Then what shall I tell them?”  God said to Moses, “I AM WHO I AM. This is what you are to say to the Israelites: ‘I AM has sent me to you.’”

God also said to Moses, “Say to the Israelites, ‘The LORD the God of your fathers—the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac and the God of Jacob—has sent me to you.’ This is my name forever, the name by which I am to be remembered from generation to generation.

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